British English vs. Malaysian English

British English vs. Malaysian English Who says our English is teruk? Just read below - Ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to-the-point, effective etc.
 
WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
 Britons: I'm sorry, sir, but we don't seem to have
 the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a
 moment, I can call the other outlets for you.

 Malaysians: No stock.

RETURNING A CALL
 Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone call for me
 a few moments ago?

 Malaysians: Hello, who call?


 ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY
 Britons: Excuse me, I would like to get by. Would you
 please make way?

 Malaysians: S-kuse me.

 WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
 Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible
 for me to enter through this door?

  Malaysians: (pointing at the door) Can ah?


 WHEN ENTERTAINING
 Britons: Please make yourself right at home.

 Malaysians: No need shy shy one lah!

 WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
 Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.

 Malaysians: Where got?

 WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
 Britons: I would prefer not to do that, if you don't
 mind.

  Malaysians: Don't want lah.
 
 WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE.
 Britons: Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice?
 I'm trying to concentrate over here.

 Malaysians: Shut up lah!

 WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION.
 Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the
 moment.

 Malaysians: Die lah!!
 
 WHEN SOMEONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
 Britons: This isn't the way to do it. Here, let me show
 you..

 Malaysians: Like that also don't know how to do!

 WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
 Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me?

 Malaysians: Celaka you!

###

Source from: http://liliyusoff-ikhlas2u.blogspot.com/

Posted in: 2011,humors